Today I had a meeting at 8:30 and class at 3:30.
Ouch, that’s a lot of time to procrastinate. So instead of making a pretty powerpoint presentation on reverse osmosis, I am writing this post. And gosh, it’s hard to write honestly, to say what I mean without stepping on toes or mis-representing how I feel. But if there’s a safe space for me to do that, it’s this blog, right? At least in theory.
I am thankful for divorce. Yikes, I went there. I don’t know if that sentence has ever come out of my mouth or my heart before now, but I can already feel the tears. Since my parents comprise more than half of my blog viewers, and they know how I feel, it’s okay for me to share this. I was five when my parents separated, and I don’t remember a lot from that period of time except for the different places we lived until they both settled in Fort Mill. What I remember most is how often they told John and I that they loved us, and that none of this was our fault. And while their split custody arrangement was crazy even for divorced standards, John and I never went more than a couple days without seeing both parents. Because I was so young when it happened, I never got around to thinking about how I felt until I was in college. And while divorce is painful, I have come around to being thankful for it. I know both of my parents as individuals, something that likely wouldn’t have happened if they were married. I respect them so much more for the fact that they worked full time and were single parents, because that’s got to be one of the hardest things ever. John was only two when they separated, and two-year-olds are the absolute worst, I have no idea how they did it. I am thankful that my mom found a happy marriage, and Johnny has been such a gift to us. If there’s a way to do divorce right, I think my parents did it. They always made John and I their priority, something that is uncommon with most divorced parents, who try to play a game of favorites. What’s more is that I am thankful they were so strict with us. If we were grounded at one house, we were grounded at the other. Although my parents were on different pages with each other, they were on the same page when it came to raising John and I. That’s got to be a selfless thing, to put your kids first like that. I am so proud of my parents for who they are, how they raised me, and the amazing things they have accomplished on their own. And I will take a good divorce over an unhappy marriage any day.